Today went pretty well, I'm still really struggling with my husbands ex-wife and some of her decisions. It's so hard being a step-parent and seeing what is going on and the egos that are involved, but not being able to do anything about it. I'm so proud of myself for not giving into the tempation of eating some of the junk my husband just brought home from the grocery store (talk about sabotaging behavior!). I really need to find an outlet for the frustration and anger I'm feeling towards my husbands ex-wife. It's eating me up inside! Without food to numb me, I need something to get it out. I did make everyone take a walk with me last night. BS (Bonus Son) hated the walk, he complained and dragged his feet the whole time, BD (Bonus Daughter) LOVED the whole thing and was running and skipping and just generally having a great time. DH (Dear Husband) was game, although I don't think he liked that he had to deal with BS dragging his feet and complaining the whole time. I am proud of all of us though - 30 minutes. A great start in my book!
I've found it's easier to track what I'm eating in sparkpeople.com, this gives me reports and other things that seem to motivate me. I'm going to try pasting what I ate yesterday down below to give a detailed account of what I'm eating.
I'm already surprised at how much I snack while I'm cooking. I think I've been eating two meals every time I cook, one while I'm cooking and one while I'm eating with the family.
Stats for today:
Water: 10 glasses
Food: (it didn't copy very well, but you get the gist)
THURSDAY, MARCH 17, 2011
BREAKFAST
Calories Fat Carbohydrates Protein
Scrambled Egg, 2 large 140 15 3 14
Cheese, Kraft Mexican Style Taco Cheese, 0.13 cup 52 4 1 3
Butter, salted, 0.25 tbsp 25 3 0 0
Mushrooms, cooked, 1 mushroom 3 0 1 0
Onions, raw, 0.13 cup, chopped 8 0 2 0
La Tortilla Factory - Low Carb Tortilla, 0.5 serving 25 1 5 3
Milk, 2%, 0.25 fl oz 4 0 0 0
Ham, extra lean, (5% fat), 1 slice (6-1/4" x 4" x 1/16") 37 1 0 5
295 24 11 25
LUNCH
Calories Fat Carbohydrates Protein
Baby Carrots, raw, 4 medium 13 0 3 0
Sunflower Seeds, with salt added, 0.25 oz 41 4 2 1
Tossed Salad, 2.5 cup 55 0 11 4
Sunsweet, Dried Cranberries, 1.5 oz, 0.25 serving 35 0 9 0
Brianna's HomeStyle Chipotle Cheddar Dressing, 2.5 tbsp 138 14 5 1
Tillamook Pepper Jack Cheese, 2 oz 220 18 2 12
502 36 32 19
DINNER
Calories Fat Carbohydrates Protein
Sour Cream, 1 tbsp 26 3 1 0
Cheddar or Colby Cheese, Low Fat, 0.33 oz 16 1 0 2
Ground Turkey, 0.75 patty (4 oz, raw) (yield after cooking) 145 8 0 17
Black Olives, 8 jumbo 54 5 4 1
Romaine Lettuce (salad), 1.5 cup, shredded 12 0 2 1
Red Ripe Tomatoes, 0.13 cup, chopped or sliced 5 0 1 0
Taco Shells, 1 medium (approx 5" dia) 62 3 8 1
Kroger Creamy Ranch Dressing, 0.5 tbsp 23 2 1 0
Salsa, Southwest Salsa (Safeway Select brand), 1 tbsp 5 0 0 0
347 21 16 23
Overall totals are : 1144 Calories, 81g fat, 59g carbohydrates, 67g protein. Pretty good, if I do say so myself. I was really surprised to learn while looking at the graph of a breakdown of my calories that the two slices of cheese that I put on my salad were the largest portion of my calorie base today!! I was raised on putting cheese on everything, so I've never really paid much attention to what it's actually composed of. This is going to be really good for me, I'm sure!
Exercise:
30 minute walk with family after dinner
40 crunches (front), 15 crunches (each side), 20 lower crunches, 10 push ups (3 sets). I'm feeling slightly sore today and I love it!
Celebrating Today:
I exercised! Something I can always seem to find an excuse not to do. I'm really proud of myself for just doing it. I'm also really proud of myself for not indulging in the cookies my husband bought yesterday. This new lifestyle change is exactly that, a lifestyle change and I don't want to make this a diet that is going to fail because I'm restricting myself so much. So I told myself that if I have that cookie tonight it won't have time to metabolize which will just ruin everything I did for the day, so I promised myself I could have one tomorrow during lunch which will give me time to savor the thought, and give me something to look forward too, as well as give my body time to metabolize before it starts slowing down for the evening. Do you think my thinking is flawed?
Love,
Me
Friday, March 18, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
It's My Turn
I have created this blog to document my journey from an outwardly confident, opinionated, sedentary, fast food loving, plus-size woman to an inwardly confident, secure, active, healthy, thin woman. I'm ready to be a success story!
271. This is the highest number I have seen on the scale. 271. Granted, it was fully clothed and just after a big meal - but just writing it makes me face reality. I will never see that number again! The striped down, just after waking up and going pee, without drinking any water weight as of this morning was 261.8. Last Monday, March 7th, I weighed 264.6, so I lost 2.8 lbs. last week! WaHoo! I'm on my way, baby!
This is just one of MANY times that I have attempted to become this woman. I have tried nearly every diet there is out there. Really. I've even had weight loss surgery. As I sit here I think of how unbelievable it is that I have allowed myself to get here. But rather than dwell on this sobering fact, I want to celebrate my decision to start again. I WILL overcome this obstacle! I WILL reach my goals! I WILL be successful! I know how to be successful - I just need to apply the principles of success that I have learned to this aspect of my life.
Another part of this blog will be that this will act as my food journal and exercise journal. I've always suspected that snacking and "tasting" has been a source of major hidden calories for me, so in an effort of full disclosure I am going to be brutally honest with what I've eaten, even though I'm sure there will be days when I'll be tempted to "fudge" quantity but my promise to myself and you, my reader, is that I will be honest about what crosses my lips. I also promise to document my exercise attempts, however minimal they may be.
I believe that to start something without a goal is to set yourself up for failure, so here are my goals:
1. Drink at least 8 glasses of water a day.
2. Exercise each day, even if it's just one sit up, or squat.
3. Eat 6-7 servings of fruits/vegetables each day.
4. Eat around 60 grams of carbs each day.
5. Take Iodine 5 days per week.
6. Take Asea 5 days per week.
7. Track Basal Body Temperature.
8. Weigh 180 by 12/30/2011
My beginning stats:
Weight: 264.6
Body Fat %: 50%
BMI: 44.1
My beginning measurements:
Chest: 52
Waist: 49
Hips:56 1/2
Thigh: 31 1/2
Calf: 20
Upper Arm: 16
As embarrassing as it is to reveal all of this information, I am really hoping that there will be people who find this blog and will leave comments, good or bad, to encourage, advise and just generally help me along this journey.
It's my turn!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I wrote the previous portion of this post in the morning, so now I'm going to put my food log. (My husband and I went to Oakland for the evening on a date, so I splurged a little).
Food Log:
8 glasses of water
1 Breakfast Wrap :1 Low Carb WW wrap, 2 eggs, 2 tbs cheese, 1/2 tbs. butter, 1 slice ham, 2 large cherry tomatoes
1 Large salad: Baby spring mix, baby spinach, romaine lettuce, broccoli, cabbage, apple chunks, mushrooms, shredded carrot, red bell pepper, 1 slice shredded turkey, 1 T almond slices, 2 T Italian Dressingl
1 apple
1 organic nut bar
3 Texas Roadhouse rolls (I shouldn't have allowed myself to get this hungry!)
1/4th Baby Bloomin' Onion
Side salad with blue cheese dressing
3 bites of steak
3 ribs (with basted BBQ sauce)
Green Beans
Exercise:
10 minute walk
Celebrating today:
Although today wasn't the best start, I'm celebrating that I did as good as I did. Today was tremendously stressful due to some drama with my husband's ex-wife. So I'm celebrating that I handled it as well as I did, and that I didn't order dessert or get a baked potato, but veggies instead. I realize I'm not going to win this battle in one day. It will be a lot of small changes and constant effort that will make this happen for me. Next time I'll have only one roll, and will pack more snacks with me on long car rides, the one apple wasn't enough to keep me from getting hungry and going crazy when I did see the food.
271. This is the highest number I have seen on the scale. 271. Granted, it was fully clothed and just after a big meal - but just writing it makes me face reality. I will never see that number again! The striped down, just after waking up and going pee, without drinking any water weight as of this morning was 261.8. Last Monday, March 7th, I weighed 264.6, so I lost 2.8 lbs. last week! WaHoo! I'm on my way, baby!
This is just one of MANY times that I have attempted to become this woman. I have tried nearly every diet there is out there. Really. I've even had weight loss surgery. As I sit here I think of how unbelievable it is that I have allowed myself to get here. But rather than dwell on this sobering fact, I want to celebrate my decision to start again. I WILL overcome this obstacle! I WILL reach my goals! I WILL be successful! I know how to be successful - I just need to apply the principles of success that I have learned to this aspect of my life.
Another part of this blog will be that this will act as my food journal and exercise journal. I've always suspected that snacking and "tasting" has been a source of major hidden calories for me, so in an effort of full disclosure I am going to be brutally honest with what I've eaten, even though I'm sure there will be days when I'll be tempted to "fudge" quantity but my promise to myself and you, my reader, is that I will be honest about what crosses my lips. I also promise to document my exercise attempts, however minimal they may be.
I believe that to start something without a goal is to set yourself up for failure, so here are my goals:
My beginning stats:
My beginning measurements:
As embarrassing as it is to reveal all of this information, I am really hoping that there will be people who find this blog and will leave comments, good or bad, to encourage, advise and just generally help me along this journey.
It's my turn!
- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -
I wrote the previous portion of this post in the morning, so now I'm going to put my food log. (My husband and I went to Oakland for the evening on a date, so I splurged a little).
Food Log:
8 glasses of water
1 Breakfast Wrap :1 Low Carb WW wrap, 2 eggs, 2 tbs cheese, 1/2 tbs. butter, 1 slice ham, 2 large cherry tomatoes
1 Large salad: Baby spring mix, baby spinach, romaine lettuce, broccoli, cabbage, apple chunks, mushrooms, shredded carrot, red bell pepper, 1 slice shredded turkey, 1 T almond slices, 2 T Italian Dressingl
1 apple
1 organic nut bar
3 Texas Roadhouse rolls (I shouldn't have allowed myself to get this hungry!)
1/4th Baby Bloomin' Onion
Side salad with blue cheese dressing
3 bites of steak
3 ribs (with basted BBQ sauce)
Green Beans
Exercise:
10 minute walk
Celebrating today:
Although today wasn't the best start, I'm celebrating that I did as good as I did. Today was tremendously stressful due to some drama with my husband's ex-wife. So I'm celebrating that I handled it as well as I did, and that I didn't order dessert or get a baked potato, but veggies instead. I realize I'm not going to win this battle in one day. It will be a lot of small changes and constant effort that will make this happen for me. Next time I'll have only one roll, and will pack more snacks with me on long car rides, the one apple wasn't enough to keep me from getting hungry and going crazy when I did see the food.
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